Among Women ReadHER 4.28.12... converts, moms, daughters, and Stephen Colbert

Among Women ReadHER 4.28.12

A Letter to the Neophytes
By Dr. Timothy O'Malley from Oblation: Catechesis, Liturgy, and the New Evangelization 
An excellent read... for new Catholic converts, and the rest of us, frankly. If the joy of Easter is waning for you, this will jolt you back toward "Alleluia!"


How I Feel Out of My Mini-van and into My Identity
By Jennifer Fulwiler, book excerpt
This is a chapter excerpt from a new release, Style, Sex, and Substance, edited by Hallie Lord. You can dial back and listen to Hallie's visit to Among Women last year.


Stephen Colbert and Faithful Citizenship
By Katherine Schmidt at Archidiocese of Cincinnati
The role humor plays in getting important messages heard.


Why They Left
By William J. Byron and Charles Zech at America magazine
Just more ammo for why we need evangelization, and love... lots of love. Two professors with quotes from exit interviews regarding a study on why Catholics leave the Church. 


When "Sorry" Just Isn't Enough
By Rachel M at Catholic Sistas
A good start on what to say/do when someone faces miscarriage or baby loss. (Don't forget, Among Women recently had a two-part series on miscarriage.) 


The 30 Day Plan: Once a Month Cooking Can Be Easy and Fun
By Kate Wicker at Catholic Mom
So says Kate Wicker, and I usually love her cooking posts elsewhere. Hear Kate talk about her recent book, Weightless, on Among Women 107. 


Keep Laughing, Keep Listening, Keep Loving
By Marcia Morrissey at Patheos
Are we talking too much and not hearing God? Good one, Marcia! 


Calling a Truce between Mother-Daughter Conflict
By Elizabeth Bernstein in the Wall Street Journal
Dealing with adult - adult child relationship... some good tips here. The best advice? Ask what your daughter needs help with...


A great podcast with Dr. Meg Meeker and Dr. James Dobson on the subject of "Strong Fathers and Strong Daughters" - A Catholic pediatrician and an Evangelical Christian psychologist weigh in on this important topic.


Speaking of daughters, a little girl grows up before our eyes in this extraodinary video:
H/T Deacon Greg at The Deacon's Bench.


And one for road... this one for all the mothers... (yes, this is ultimately a Proctor and Gamble commercial, but very well done.)

This makes me think... about the things I might pass on to my daughter.

In general, I would want to witness to my daughter that it is worthwhile to "lay down one's life" for others in imitation of Christ. I would hope she would see from my own example that one does not need to be perfect to be a wife and a mother. Nor need one be perfect to be a single woman for Christ or to be a consecrated religious -- for Christ is all-forgiving, eager to erase the past and give us fresh energies to bear the burden of our womanly roles.


By being close to Christ, in the sacraments and in prayer, we can fulfill our great feminine vocation: to live our our love for others day by day in faithfulness.


Finally, I would have my daughter steep herself in Marian devotion and frequently read the lives of women saints so that she could see how beautiful they were in their feminine warmth, charm, and faithfulness...


I would want my daughter and all women to study John Paul II's apostolic letter "On the Dignity and Vocation of Women" (Mulieris Dignatatem). It is a remarkable document...


It this letter, the Holy Father insists that no matter how badly treated a woman may be, her essential dignity comes not from attitudes of weak and often sinful human beings, but from union with God. "This dignity consists in the supernatural elevation to union with God. (n.4)" Indeed, how many times have we faithful women of the Church found ourselves, after being beaten down by the world, kneeling in prayer before the Blessed Sacrament sensing gradually that, no matter what, we are beautiful in the eyes of God.

--Ronda Chervin, Feminine, Free, and Faithful, (1995)

The FUN Quotient... Amazing Harmonica edition

I first heard Buddy Greene play the harmonica back in my days as a deejay for a Contemporary Christian music station. My favorite song penned and song by him is "A Virtuous Woman" listed below...

Among Women Podcast # 118 features Teresa Tomeo

Among Women 118 challenges us to take time this Advent to go deeper with Christ and the Church. This week, we'll draw inspiration from two women whose lives were transformed by doing just that. The program presents a profile of Dorothy Day, whose 20th century conversion and convictions regarding service to the homeless, poor, and disenfranchised inspired countless Americans through the Catholic Worker Movement. Her cause for canonization is underway.

We also visit with media expert and radio/TV host, Teresa Tomeo, as she unpacks themes from her latest book, Extreme Makeover: Women Transformed by Christ, not Conformed to the Culture. (View trailer below.)

Together we talk about a woman's relationship with the media, plus evaluate media's potentially toxic effects on a woman's wellbeing. Don't miss taking a media "reality check"in light of your relationship with Christ on Among Women today!

Subscribe to Among Women via iTunes.

The trailer for Teresa Tomeo's Extreme Makeover...


image credit

This makes me think... about faith and the exciting intersections of anniversaries in the coming year.

 The “door of faith” (Acts 14:27) is always open for us, ushering us into the life of communion with God and offering entry into his Church. It is possible to cross that threshold when the word of God is proclaimed and the heart allows itself to be shaped by transforming grace. To enter through that door is to set out on a journey that lasts a lifetime. It begins with baptism (cf. Rom 6:4), through which we can address God as Father, and it ends with the passage through death to eternal life, fruit of the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, whose will it was, by the gift of the Holy Spirit, to draw those who believe in him into his own glory (cf. Jn17:22). To profess faith in the Trinity – Father, Son and Holy Spirit – is to believe in one God who is Love (cf. 1 Jn 4:8): the Father, who in the fullness of time sent his Son for our salvation; Jesus Christ, who in the mystery of his death and resurrection redeemed the world; the Holy Spirit, who leads the Church across the centuries as we await the Lord’s glorious return. 
(from par. 1)

...

I have decided to announce a Year of Faith. It will begin on 11 October 2012, the fiftieth anniversary of the opening of the Second Vatican Council, and it will end on the Solemnity of Our Lord Jesus Christ, Universal King, on 24 November 2013. The starting date of 11 October 2012 also marks the twentieth anniversary of the publication of the Catechism of the Catholic Church, a text promulgated by my Predecessor, Blessed John Paul II, with a view to illustrating for all the faithful the power and beauty of the faith. This document, an authentic fruit of the Second Vatican Council, was requested by the Extraordinary Synod of Bishops in 1985 as an instrument at the service of catechesis and it was produced in collaboration with all the bishops of the Catholic Church. Moreover, the theme of the General Assembly of the Synod of Bishops that I have convoked for October 2012 is “The New Evangelization for the Transmission of the Christian Faith”. This will be a good opportunity to usher the whole Church into a time of particular reflection and rediscovery of the faith. 
(from par. 4)

...

I would like to sketch a path intended to help us understand more profoundly not only the content of the faith, but also the act by which we choose to entrust ourselves fully to God, in complete freedom. In fact, there exists a profound unity between the act by which we believe and the content to which we give our assent. Saint Paul helps us to enter into this reality when he writes: “Man believes with his heart and so is justified, and he confesses with his lips and so is saved” (Rom 10:10). The heart indicates that the first act by which one comes to faith is God’s gift and the action of grace which acts and transforms the person deep within.

The example of Lydia is particularly eloquent in this regard. Saint Luke recounts that, while he was at Philippi, Paul went on the Sabbath to proclaim the Gospel to some women; among them was Lydia and “the Lord opened her heart to give heed to what was said by Paul” (Acts16:14). There is an important meaning contained within this expression. Saint Luke teaches that knowing the content to be believed is not sufficient unless the heart, the authentic sacred space within the person, is opened by grace that allows the eyes to see below the surface and to understand that what has been proclaimed is the word of God.

Confessing with the lips indicates in turn that faith implies public testimony and commitment. A Christian may never think of belief as a private act. Faith is choosing to stand with the Lord so as to live with him. This “standing with him” points towards an understanding of the reasons for believing. Faith, precisely because it is a free act, also demands social responsibility for what one believes. The Church on the day of Pentecost demonstrates with utter clarity this public dimension of believing and proclaiming one’s faith fearlessly to every person. It is the gift of the Holy Spirit that makes us fit for mission and strengthens our witness, making it frank and courageous. 

(from par. 10)

---Benedict XVI, Apostolic Letter, Moto Proprio Data, Porta Fidei. (For the Indiction of the Year of Faith.)

If it's Friday, you can usually find me at adoration...

... and I'm pleased to share this reflection, "A God With Toes," on one of my favorite sites on the world-wide-web, CatholicMom.com:

Here's snippet:

As I enter the chapel each week, my knees hit the floor and I bend low: My Lord and my God!

Not insignificantly, my Lord and my God has toes.

And I’m struck deeply by the delightful humanity of it all. The precious and weighty reality of the Incarnation becomes, remarkably, accessible. And in that moment of recognition, I find this God, who is undeniably wondrous and magnificent as the Creator of the Cosmos, all at once, very much lovable to my down-to-earth womanly sensibilities.

I have a God with toes. Isn’t THAT amazing?!

I meditate and my own mother’s heart begins to rev in high gear. I start to muse about the Babe of Bethlehem, born to Mother Mary and Joseph. I can picture the delightful scene … where natural motherlove kisses the feet of her newborn. Oh yes! Kissing infant feet lavishes love from head to toe!

Of course, I’m only surmising here, but you get the picture… I can quickly recall my own joy in kissing and counting and adoring those “piggy toes” of my own three children.

But these toes that I find in the chapel, that were once treasured by a young mother, are now mature… and then I’m thinking of another woman.

I envision a woman who was once so transformed by love of this God-made-man – this God with toes – that she sought to lay herself and her burdens at his feet, kissing them and washing them with her tears and her hair. (Lk 7:37-38.) Her actions signal surrender, and a yielding to sublime love, tender and chastely passionate all at once.

 Here's the whole piece.

Among Women Podcast #44

This week's Among Women focuses on the genius of womanhood -- not only as we are created by God, but also as explained in the title of a new book by Karen Doyle, The Genius of Womanhood.

And we also hear a story about the faith of St. Scholastica, the sister of St. Benedict of Nursia.

Also get early details about the forthcoming Catholic New Media Celebration to take place in Boston, Aug 6-8:  CNMC "MMX".

This struck me in today's scripture...

Mary set out

and traveled to the hill country in haste

to a town of Judah,

where she entered the house of Zechariah

and greeted Elizabeth.

When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting,

the infant leaped in her womb,

and Elizabeth, filled with the Holy Spirit,

cried out in a loud voice and said,

“Blessed are you among women,

and blessed is the fruit of your womb.

And how does this happen to me,

that the mother of my Lord should come to me?

For at the moment

the sound of your greeting reached my ears,

the infant in my womb leaped for joy.

Blessed are you who believed

that what was spoken to you by the Lord would be fulfilled.”

--Luke 1: 39-45

What's not to love about this passage?  Two holy women... in the presence of God and one another... This is what "among women" is all about... Jesus, Mary, community, blessedness.

Enjoy the waning days of Advent.... O come, O come Emmanuel...

Theology of the Body and Advent...

Ladies, just in case no one ever told ya... it is all about you... so says Fr. Thomas Loya in this most recent article. Yes, believe it or not, he ties the message in with Advent and Christmas.

Fr. Thomas Loya, a big-time promoter of theology of the body, always makes me think... and his podcast A Body of Truth is a thoughtful, provocative, challenging, and engrossing program on topics in life and love as seen through the lens of theology of the body.

Women and the Church

This article covers many of the topics we've covered on the Among Women podcast. Take a few moments to read it.

Here's a snippet:

Feminism has concentrated on equality and power in its quest for justice for women.  Because men and women complement each other, equality should not mean ‘exactly the same.’  Human dignity is the foundation for equality, and equality is enhanced by collaboration.  Kierkegaard said that, “Femininity is a lynchpin of human life; once it is uprooted, the consequence are disastrous.  In fact, experience proved that [radical] feminism benefits men and harms women.” (Kierkegaard, Either-Or, p ii, 260-1).

Pope John Paul II said that the “dignity and balance of human life depends at every moment of history and in every place upon who man will be for women, and who women will be for men.” (TOB 43:7).  In a letter to women, he wrote about the ‘genius of women’ and thanked them for all their contributions to society as mothers, sisters, and workers in the Lond’s vineyard.  Women are made for relationships, they possess great beauty, and have a deep element of mystery.  Saint Teresa Benedicta of the Cross (Edith Stein) said that women’s natural role was to “To cherish, guard, protect, nourish, and advance growth.”  Every woman is called to be a bride in some form or another. 

The author also lists a good reading list:


The Privilege of Being a Woman by Alice von Hildebrand
Theology of His/Her Body by Jason Evert
Collaboration of Men and Women in the Church by CDF/Joseph Ratzinger
Letter to Women by Pope John Paul the Great.
Ordinatio Sacerdotalis by Pope John Paul the Great.
Charter of the Rights of the family.
Apostolic Letter Proclaiming Co-Patronesses of Europe by Pope John Paul the Great.
Bible Women Speak to Us Today by Mary Jensen.
Elucidations by Hans Urs von Balthasar.

What Does Woman Want?

A fascinating piece on sexless marriages and more in First Things by Mary Eberstadt, a Hoover Institute Research Fellow (at Stanford) and a Catholic Scholar.  There's also a audio interview with her here.

Note: this piece talk about some of pornography's effects on a marriage, among other things coming up in women's popular literature and magazines in the commercial marketplace.

Here's a snippet:

Something else lurks under the rocks picked up by the fashionable writing about marriage these days—something that crawls away from the light even as it squirms just under the surface of much of the new confessionalism.

“Don’t eat too many snacks, or you’ll ruin your dinner.” Every woman issuing the new literature of complaint and heartache will understand just how meaningful the saying is—at least when it applies to kids and dinnertime. Yet sexual satiety, of the kind that oozes by other names from so much female confessional literature these days, is almost never recognized the same way. In particular, pornography is the invisible ink of many of these essays and lives—obvious one minute, unnoticed the next, and the bearer of a message no one apparently sees. Understood or not, however, it appears to be leaving a mark on at least some of these publicly lived lives.

In Loh’s essay, for example, a husband—as it happens, one of those husbands no longer interested in sex with his wife—bookmarks his pornography on the computer; his wife knows all about it, even reports it to her friends who are also commiserating about their sexless marriages—and no one seems to connect the dots at all. Another writer for Salon, reflecting on Loh’s essay, similarly nudges up against this obvious if missing piece of the puzzle (in a piece called “Why Your Marriage Sucks”), noting, “I write this article from a hotel room in New York City, where nearly a dozen porn movies are on offer”—a fact the author uses to highlight what she thinks of as an irony, when it might instead suggest something else: a possible causal relation between all those movies on the one hand and, on the other hand, a loss of romantic interest on the part of those who think them inconsequential.

Or consider the critical success of a recent chick-lit book called I’d Rather Eat Chocolate. Praised in Salon and The Atlantic and other cutting-edge venues, it is the casually told story of a husband and wife whose tension over marital sex leads finally to an amicable solution: She has her chocolate, and he has his Internet pornography. Might there just be a connection between all this casual talk (and use) of pornography and all those frustrated women and disinterested husbands?

Dr. Phil, interestingly enough—among other sexperts concerned with the sexlessness of some modern marriages—has no trouble connecting the dots at all: “It is a perverse and ridiculous intrusion into your relationship,” he writes on his website. “It is an insult, it is disloyal, and it is cheating. . . . You need to tell your partner that viewing pornography is absolutely, unequivocally unacceptable in your relationship.” Why does he see what so many unhappy women do not?

The answer is that the kind of feminism these women have so unthinkingly imbibed has come at a great cost. It has rendered many of them ideologically if not personally blasé about something they cannot really afford to be blasé about. InFemale Chauvinist Pigs: Women and the Rise of Raunch Culture, Ariel Levy chronicles the steady infiltration of pornography into female society. The pressure on women to accept pornography as an inconsequential and entertaining fact of life rises by the year—and outside the circles of the conservative and the religious, there is little cultural ammunition for any woman who wants to resist it. In fact, one of the few tony writers who does seem to grasp the destructive role of pornography in modern romance is Naomi Wolf, who chillingly observed several years ago that “the onslaught of porn is responsible for deadening male libido in relation to real women, and leading men to see fewer and fewer women as porn-worthy.” Almost none of her feminist sisters have followed suit.

All of which brings us back to the enigma of this summer’s marriage wars. Perhaps some of the modern misery of which so many women today authentically speak is springing not from a sexual desert but from a sexual flood—a torrent of poisonous imagery, beginning even in childhood, that has engulfed women and men, only to beach them eventually somewhere alone and apart, far from the reach of one another.

At least that way of looking at the puzzle might explain some of the paradox of all that female unhappiness. Between bad ideas of gender neutrality and even worse ideas of the innocence of pornography, we reach the world so vividly described by Sandra Loh and many other dissatisfied women: one where men act like stereotypical women, and retreat from a real marriage into a fantasy life via pornography (rather than Harlequin novels), and where women conversely act like stereotypical men, taking the lead in leaving their marriages and firing angry charges on the way, out of frustration and withheld sex.

It wasn’t supposed to happen that way, but it has. Enlightened people only meant to take the small- s sex out of marriage: the unwanted gender division. Along the way, capital- s Sex headed for the exits as well.

I'm still collecting for the Making Strides Walk!

Here's a video about this!

It Makes Me Think...

Mary is the one creature who unconditionally accepted her creatureliness with all its limitations and weaknesses, with the trust that the Lord, who has seen the humility of His servant, would accomplish great things in her soul.  Those women who have repeatedly been deemed "weak" find in Mary their special title of glory.  How sweet to be weak when one is carried by the all-loving and all-powerful God who can do all things. That this "weakness," this gentleness and frailty is... transfigured by grace is powerfully expressed in the liturgy in which the sweet flower of Nazareth is referred to as "an army set in array."


-----Alice von Hilderbrand, The Privilege of Being a Woman.