If you haven't heard this episode of Among Women featuring a wife's forgiveness of her husband's crime, you should... here's a preview!

"Tracy", a longtime listener to Among Women shares her secret to forgiveness, and the cure for her anger over her husband's crime and punishment...

Among Women Podcast #127 Captive Hearts Now Free

Among Women 127 tells remarkable stories of the faith of women imprisoned for the faith in our "Blessed are They" segment, as it relates the passion and death of Sts. Perpetua and Felicity, two martyrs who were jailed for their beliefs in Christ and executed in the arena. Their lives are forever memorialized in Eucharistic Prayer I, otherwise known as the Roman Canon.

In our "Among Women" segment, I bring an interview that is months in the making. "Tracy" from the sunny beach, is a longtime AW listener who came forward to share her story of faith and family triumph as she emerged from 8 years of separation from her husband who was imprisoned for a felony. Through her testimony "Tracy" talks about clinging to God's Word in the middle of the night, the sanctity of marriage vows, the power of loving friendships in the Body of Christ, and the reconciling graces of forgiveness.

"Tracy" reminds us that for every person who has ever served time, in many ways, their families serve the time too. Hear how she picked up the pieces and moved on one day at a time. 

Among Women ReadHer 9.10.11

Among Women ReadHer

9.10.11

Forgive Everyone for Everything
--Fr. Stephen Freeman, an Eastern Orthodox priest, from his blog, Glory to God for All Things
Thoughtful reading, also references Dostoeveski's The Brothers Karamosov.


A Deliberate Life
--Karen Edmisten, from the blog of the same name
Some times the best lessons are the most basic. Nice one!

Abortion Kills a Potential Saint, But It's Not a Saintly Deal Killer

--Kathryn Jean Lopez, the NRO Editor shows up at the Catholic News Agency.
Another brilliant piece from Lopez - this time about Dorothy Day's abortion and whether it impacts her cause for canonization.

Cry Room Wish List

 -- Lisa Hendey, at Faith and Family Live

Some excellent advice and things to ponder for our parishes, and don't miss this earlier post as well: 

Rachel Balducci's Cry Room Conundrum 

Living an Awesome Story
--Jennifer Fulwiler, from Conversion Diary
Be. Not. Afraid. Most of us can never hear this too much.

The Curious Case of the Cursing Coach
--Joel Schmidt, from Practicing Catholic
If it is football season in your house, this is conversation-worthy.


Spiritual Warfare and the Screwtape Letters
-- From the team at the Catholic Spiritual Direction blog
You must check out this well-acted video about the making of a great audio book version of CS Lewis' The Screwtape Letters. And if you've never read the book, get it! I highly recommend it.

OK, I'm loving this video! 

HT: The Deacon's Bench - with a shout out to the Boston University Catholic Center young adults at about 2:24 in -- out in the snowy sidewalk on Comm Ave in front of Marsh Chapel.

Oh, and this one too...
HT: The Anchoress

In honor of 9/11:


Documentary: "9/11: The Day that Changed the World" - on the Smithsonian Channel (you can watch it online.)


The Church's Noblest at Ground Zero
-- Sr. Mary Ann Walsh, from Patheos

No Clergy at Ground Zero
-- Elizabeth Scalia, from her blog, The Anchoress, at Patheos

My own piece on the subject will run here tomorrow, and at Patheos.


image credit

Among Women ReadHer... 6.11.11

Among Women ReadHer

6.11.11

Miscarriage
-- Fr Frank Pavone from Priests for Life on Catholic Lane
Sensitive commentary.


Things I've Learned in Times of Doubt 
-- Karen Edmisten on her blog of the same name
Thumbs up, Karen!


Faith in the Time of Breast Lumps 
-- Elizabeth Esther
What to do while you're waiting for the diagnostic exam.


Pagan Convert: Christie Martin 
-- Christie Martin at Why I'm Catholic
Her conversion story in her own words.

How to Tie Your Shoes
-- courtesy of Julie Davis at Happy Catholic
Gosh, a small revelation.


Taking Class with the X-Men 
-- Maria Morera Johnson at Patheos' Catholic Portal
Got super-hero fans at your house? Need some help conversing with them? Check this out.


Teaching Self Control [to children] is Great Summer Exercise
-- Mary Beth Hicks
One of the fruits of the Spirit, don't ya know...


The Ins and Outs of Opening a Door for a Woman 
-- Brett & Kate McKay
So, what's your experience?


Finally, a story of a remarkable woman...
Watch this video clip about forgiving your son's killer. 
HT: Deacon Greg at The Deacon's Bench

A Word in Season: "AS" We Forgive Those...

My weekly column, A Word in Season, tackles dealing with resentment and working on forgiveness. Ah yes, so much comes clear in the season Lent... or am I the only one who gets tripped up with these things? Anyway, here's some of what you'll find there...

Observe the little word in the line of the Lord’s Prayer that gets to the heart of it all…

 “Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.”

This petition is astonishing…. according to the second phrase, our petition will not be heard unless we have first met a strict requirement. Our petition looks to the future, but our response must come first, for the two parts are joined by the single word "as." (Catechism of the Catholic Church, par. 2838.)

That little word “as” … is AS-tonishing! No getting around it. It’s the stickler, the caveat, the tipping point, for the truth of this teaching. 

How many times have I asked God’s forgiveness for something, when I really had no clue that I was to extend it to others first? Often, I just rattled off the words of prayer, not paying attention to what they meant.

The Lord desires my true conversion, so I had to get it straight: “Our response must come first.” Then the Lord “hears” my prayer. 

Ok, it's not an easy teaching, but you'll find the rest here.

Mind the Gap

 

This is my latest over at CatholicMom.com, but you can enjoy it here too.

I've been to London twice. Four times if you count the layovers at Heathrow now and again. And this is one of my favorite expressions found throughout the London Tube System:  Mind the Gap.

It’s a polite warning for rail travelers to mind your footing as you step onto or off the train, taking notice of the distance between the arriving train car and the platform.  You see the sign and the notices everywhere.  And the automated public address system reminds you day and night of the same, all with proper British civility.

Your safety depends on minding the gap.  Keeping aright amidst ongoing change demands deliberate attention and action.

Lately, in my own little corner of New England, I’ve been finding all sorts of new applications for the phrase mind the gap.

Creative financing with my checkbook… mind the gap.

Flossing my teeth at night… mind the gap(s).

Missing my out-of-state sisters – I must give a call… mind the gap.

My teenaged driver is learning how to parallel park, not to mention pulling my car into the garage: mind the gap, (or its second cousin, with the prefix, please God!)

And now this one:  allow me suggest that mind the gap can be a fruitful caution for married and engaged couples.

If your marriage is like mine – it often resembles a fast-moving train through life – its course passing through many stations in life.  Each station brings platforms of varying height.  Failing to mind the gap may be perilous.

A marriage must constantly adjust to new terrain and circumstances.

Recently, I expressed to my husband that I was feeling a gap between us. He knew what I meant. He was feeling it too. We had failed to mind the gap.

We had been separated by necessity (business travel is a common occurrence in our home), and we had peaceful homecomings, but other pressures were mounting. Stressors in our family life and routines were pushing us away from one another.

Weeks of not minding the gap allowed it to grow and take its toll on us.

By mentioning it aloud, in a gentle way, I was taking the first deliberate step toward proper footing.

The next step was a date night of sorts: we knew we needed to unload some frustrations about the state of our relationship, and we needed to get out of the house to do it.  Coffee and sharing a piece of pie at a local diner would suffice. 

The good thing about talking about one’s problems in a public setting is that it allows proper civility to reign.  Courtesy toward one another and others is demanded, even when you have a difficult topic to broach.  (Bear in mind, I do believe in privacy for spouses. Often discreet time alone is needed to address delicate concerns out of the earshot of others.  This was not one of those times.  We needed time away from the stressors at home.)

Thankfully, the providence of God knew just what we needed too: our restaurant hostess guided us to a private corner booth.

We placed our order, smiled cordially, and chitchatted about the kids and some routine household matters. 

When the pie came, it was the moment of truth.

What of the gap?  What was happening to us lately?  How did we let this stress consume us for so long?

We took turns, respectfully, unloading our burdens. There were many good reasons for the gap that has swallowed us.  Life is just hard sometimes, and for the last few months, it has just been getting harder.

The humble pie consumed, the waitress refilled our coffees.

What was needed was the work of apologies and forgiveness.  We had hurt each other, no doubt.  In not minding the gap, the shifting circumstances of our life tripped us up.

Very simply, we were not being MINDFUL of one another. 

We had taken each other for granted. It was a painful misstep.  Sometimes when you’ve been pulling into the same station for years, you forget to actually enjoy the local scenery and observe your surroundings.

Mindfulness is taking a deliberate, attentive step onto something solid.  It is taking notice of situations and positioning oneself to take the next logical step.

Mindfulness is more than just knowing the other’s preferences… it is actually taking that knowledge and acting on it, deliberately.  It is placing another’s needs and desires ahead of our own.

Mindfulness is doing the good thing, the right thing, yes, even the holy thing, on purpose.

Mindfulness in Christian marriage means we are always seeking to be ONE, instead of two.

When we are mindful of one another in our daily lives, we dwell in security and peace and protection.  When we fail to be mindful, we trip and fall.

Jesus stood in the gap for us between heaven and hell, between real life and something less, a counterfeit.  He came because the Father was ever mindful of the gap. 

God saw that the disturbing distance between his people and himself needed deliberate attention.  And not just temporary stopgap, but a permanent bridge that brought full restoration and communion between both sides.

And so he sent Jesus.  And thanks to Jesus, we have the way, the truth and the life – the permanent fix for gap-minding and gap-mending in our own lives.

So, hubby and I renewed our love for one another, after confessing our shortcomings.  We talked about how certain choices and responses to circumstances crowded “us” out.  There was more, but you get the point.

To quote my husband, it was like we were in a rat race and the rats were winning.  We needed to recalibrate, redirect, and recharge our unified effort in fighting off the proverbial rats in our midst.


After all, rats are those creepy gap-dwelling critters found under railway tracks and platforms.


Oh yeah, that's another good reason to mind the gap.
©2009 Patricia W. Gohn